1. Wear your glasses. Make sure your partner is actually in the bed.

2. Set timer for 3 minutes, in case you doze off in the middle.

3. Set the mood with lighting. (Turn them ALL OFF!)

4. Write partner's name on your hand in case you can't remember.

5. Have Tylenol ready in case you actually complete the act.

6. If it works, call everyone you know with the good news.

7. Don't even think about trying it twice.